Chi's story

When my wife's brother was born, she was only nine years old. During the birth, Chi's mother had some complications (what exactly I can't gather) and her brain was starved of oxygen for a short time. Her recovery was long, spending a month in the HCMC woman's hospital before being moved to District 5's Cho Ray. Eventually she recovered to today being able to function normally, but was left partially sighted. After the time of birth, she was obviously unable to take care of the baby boy Dai, and her sister helped her through the first year. Chi's aunt took care of the baby, whilst Chi lived with another aunt. At weekends, Chi would visit her baby brother and her mother. Chi's father who was responsible for the 24 hour care of her mother seemed to be overwhelmed by his duties and the situation, turning instead to drinking and gambling. It wasn't much later after Chi's mother regained her health that she pressed through with a divorce. Previously, she had been the main breadwinner in the family, whilst her husband was just a waiter. It was her inability to work due to her eyesight and the lack of support from her husband which made a very difficult decision become real. Here is Dai at one year old with his mother.

Through an arrangement with a friend, Dai was adopted by a French family. Here they are, in HCMC, visiting Chi's house. Right is Chi's mother, left her Aunt who cared for Dai through the first year.

Chi's mother insisted that no money was involved, the only condition was that the families stay in touch, which they have done without fail over the years, sending photos, letters, cards and emails. The pain of such a decision was tempered by the knowledge that Dai was being bought up in a happy family, getting a good education and enjoying all the things he wouldn't have had in Vietnam.

Meanwhile, Chi and her mother lived together. Chi revealed to me only yesterday that her mother had seriously considered a similar fate for her, but in the end decided against it. By Grade 6, Chi was shopping at the market and preparing basic meals for herself and her mother. By the middle of Grade 8, she was working at the Saigon Horse Racing track selling tickets at weekends.

Over in France Jean-Baptiste (Dai) was continuing his growth and education.

First day at school...

Today Jean-B is a strapping 15 years old and doing well at school. Chi is so immensely proud she is fit to burst.

A week today, Chi and I will fly to Paris. After three nights wandering the streets and savouring the atmosphere we will catch a train three hours south east to the town of Besancon. Here Chi will be reunited with her brother for the first time since he left Vietnam as a one year old baby. Discussion of this event is already banned in our house for fear of the waterworks starting. It will be an emotional few days for us when we drive to stay in Gex, the hometown of JB and family, up in the mountains of the Jura region just a few kilometers from Geneva.

For Chi especially, I hope this is the start of a great relationship with her brother and his wonderful family -- the heartbreak she feels from what happened will I hope in some way be forgotten as they meet for the first time as adults. . The events 15 years ago shaped Chi's entire life and personality -- and all she wants most of all is a happy family. It's something she has missed out on for so long.